♥ I L0ve Y0u , Endlessly ♥

Friday, January 26, 2007

iit's alreadii 3.50am lerrs, but ii still cant get to slp. lots of thiing iin moii miind. haiis. empty promiises agaiin, say wanna cum fetch miie sooo manii tiimes lerrs, but end upp wiith diisappoiinted. forget iit bba. maybb he iishx rather busy or tiired bba. should bbe more understandiing bba. as moii work place iishx rather far, n he dubb realii know the actual locatiion mahhs.
jus now talk to yiing abt moii problem fer quiite long, she askk miie why choose to love a person till sooo xiinku. get moii liife sooo miiserable. but to miie, love iishx sumthiing tat u have to use ur heart n bulid everythiing upp, should giive n take. iin every relatiionshiip there will hurt, sadness n sorrows dde, iif ther no kiinda of thiing iin a relatiionshiip dden iit's not consiider as love lerrs bba.
yiing askk miie ii treat hiim still not gud eluff mehhs, she nv seem aniione around her treatiing theiir bf sooo gud dde.
honestly, ii thiink ii treat hiim wasnt gud eluff, iit's can still bbe beta dde lorrs. iif ii still got the chance to do sooo, ii swear ii will treat hiim as gud as ii can.
liing told miie tat day, she saiid, she rather ii choose to go back to boii dden eddy, coz at lease wiith boii ii wun bbe sooo sad n iishx beta to fiind sumone tat love miie more dden ii love hiim.
but ii no longer have anii feeliing fer hiim lerrs, how can ii go back to hiim, how can ii let go the everythiing wiith eddy now wen ii had alreadii fall sooo deeply.
sooo wat iif ii go back n he treat miie liike priincess? ii dubb love hiim lerrs, thiing will end upp more worst. both of us wun bbe happii n will bbe verii xiinku dde. iit's unfaiir to hiim too.

tat day liing told miie wat her's xiiao jiiu tell hiim, he saiid, sumtiime wen ppls tot tat they love sumone but actually iit's was jus sum kind of rely.
and ii thiink back n ii finally realise actually ii had nv love boii before. iin the fiirst place the reason ii stead wiith hiim, iishx wanna used hiim to help miie forget rj. as tiimes passes by he treat miie verii gud, settle everythiing fer miie, pamper miie liike priincess n slowly by slowly ii started to rely on hiim more n more. all along, ii tot iishx love but iit's not true.

but now ii know iit verii clearly, as fer eddy, ii realii love hiim, iishx not a kiind of rely. haiis.

ii dubb wanna cry, ii dubb wanna say aniithiing coz ii realii dubb wanna giive hiim more pressure n stress hiimself more. iinfact, ther lots of questiion n words ii would like to askk n tell hiim, but ii realii dunno how to say. iin another senses, ii was afraiid to askk, coz ii was afraiid to get a ans a dubb wanna heard. perhaps everythiing iim doiin now, iincludiing not iinsist to meet hiim even iif ii miiz hiim lots, iishx a kiind of runniing away bba. ii admiit iim sumone who would face the facts dde, will try to runaway. tiis iishx why wen iim sad, ii always feel liike driinkiing, ii know iit's useless iit's will jus hurt moii health, but tiis the onlii way to run bba.

iinfact, ii should bbe happii coz ii off tml n meetiing hiim, can accompany hiim fer the whole day, but iim not, coz ii dunno wat emotiion should ii use to face hiim n hiis bro. ii know tml no matter wat ii wun bbe happii dde, but ii wouldnt wan aniione to know tat iim sad, ii deciided to act as iin iim happii, ii know iit's will bbe verii xiinku, but ii try moii best bba. haiis.

the onlii ans ii wiish to know the most was,
do euu still love miie?

5 more days to our's 3 months lerrs. dubb dare to iimagiine how tat day will bbe.

` mrsEDDY `
` 04.25 `

That's When I Y0u

3:44 AM